THE COLLEGE HILL INDEPENDENT


The British Aren’t Coming

by by Nupur Shridhar

we heart walnuts

Despite centuries of evidence gathered in the lab and in between the sheets, researchers are still arguing over the existence of the G-spot. Scientists from Kings College London recently published the results of a study involving 900 pairs of identical and non-identical female twins. Their reasoning: if the G-spot did exist, the genetically identical twins would experience the same amounts of G-spot stimulation. Their results: no correlation. Their conclusion: the G-spot must be “subjective.” Hate to break it you, but apparently we’ve been faking all along.

Fortunately for us, their kinky neighbors to the south mounted a predictable, speedy, and highly personal response. Just three weeks after the controversial Kings College conclusions, angry French gynecologists convened at a “G-Day” conference in Paris to tell it like it is: the British are prudes and have never been fucking right. Dr. Odile Buisson vented to The Guardian about British medical sexisms, saying, “I don’t want to stigmatize at all but I think the Protestant, liberal, Anglo-Saxon character means you are very pragmatic. There has to be a cause for everything, a gene for everything. I think it’s totalitarian.”

As illogical as it seems to publish results that go against the personal experiences of thousands, controversy over the Gräfenberg spot is nothing new. Though the undoubtedly devoted German gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg hypothesized its existence in 1950, the term wasn’t coined till 1981, and even then, many remained skeptical—after all, it’s easier to say that women don’t have a G-spot than to take the time to find one.

But it also ain’t that hard to get your walnut: the G-spot is usually about one to three inches inside the vagina, so roll up your sleeves and dive right in (if you’d like). It’s located on the anterior wall (think belly button, not butt) and is about the size/shape/texture of a walnut. Once you’ve found the spot, a “come-hither” motion tends to work very well—but so does almost anything else.