Redux Dictionary

by by Ellora Vilkin

illustration by by Katy Windemuth


These words may be out of print, but if vintage is cool then archaic is next-level. Drop one of these babies next time you’re at sup. Outshine your arch-blatherskite with a real humdinger. Impress that honey-slop you’ve been dinking out over. What, don’t you buy it? Save the contumely and ask Joyce. No one’s calling him a snivelard. Come on, we dare you.


bobby-dazzler [`bс bi `dæz lɛr], n. ca.1866

Something striking or excellent; a strikingly-dressed person.

“The kickball crew were bobby-dazzlers in smirks and striped cotton; sartorially, they were unbeatable.”


findible [`fɪn dɪ bəl], adj. ca. 1656

Able to be split or cleft.

“The pizza arrived, oozing and findible.”


graocracy [greɪ `с krə si], n. ca. 1830

Government by an old woman or old women.

“A graocracy controls Bravo’s programming.”


kexy [`kɛk si], adj. ca. 1641

Dry and brittle; withered; like a kex.

“James hated how kexy his hands felt after flying, so he made sure to pack a tin of shea butter.”


magpiety [mæg `pai ɛ di], n. ca. 1832

Talkativeness, garrulity (esp. on religious or moral topics); affected piety.

“The perfect candidate would combine Sarah’s charisma and Mitt’s magpiety.”


murklins [`mɛrk lɪnz], adv. ca. 1568

In the dark.

“When people make out it’s usually murklins.”


nuncheon [`nən(t) ʃ(ə)n], n. ca. 1260

A drink taken in the afternoon; a light refreshment between meals; a snack.

“Jack and Gilda always dawdled at nuncheon, giggling over their Arnold Palmers.”


shenk [ʃɛnk], v. ca. 1496

To pour out (liquor); to give (a person) drink.

“May I shenk you?”


Thurseve [`θərz iv], n. ca. 1325

The evening before Thursday; Wednesday night.

“I always get laid on Thurseve.”


quop [kwсp], v. ca. 1382

To tremble, wriggle, writhe; to throb, pulsate, palpitate.

“The thought of seeing Kendrick in the flesh made Astrid’s heart quop.”