Why no one had ever had the insight to film a club jam outside a convenience store before is a mystery to me. They provide a dusky atmosphere and plenty of soft drinks. JdR points out that the dude that this chick is dancing with is not going to give her love. Luckily, JdR has the solution. Sleep with him now, just say the word and they’ll go, he’ll be the teacher, show her the ropes. He repeats his solution a few times mostly because it’s the chorus but also because he really cares about her and wants to see her problem solved. Ok, while all that was good, the next verse is just KILLER. In case the chick was confused by his mind games he goes on to negate all the great game he just spat. I would compare him to a great novelist right here, but I actually can’t remember anyone in the canon who’s ever written/done/thought anything that baller. He explains that “some girls know all the right things to say (ey aaaay)” BUT “when it comes down to it, it’s all just ga-ay-ayme.” Then he explains more about how he is great at sex. That’s pretty cool also. Basically Jason DeRulo is the greatest rhetorician since, like, Cicero, but probably gets laid a lot more so yeah he wins.

THIS AND MORE CONTROVERSIAL OPINIONS IN THIS WEEK’S INDY!

<3 The Management